Brutal or giving? The labyrinths of betrayal and the wonders of our psychism. You knew and it was a doorway for you to return to your self. A freedom in fact from the necessary illusions of romantic love. A hope to visit the shores of your own illness without the compromises of an other and their imperfections and separate lives. Maybe you didn't know...It is good that I cheated first...a shadow to counter your shadow...(maybe?- Cathy and Rob are sure you must have been fucking with Dick when you were in Halifax. Such a bedroom farce I guess.)

Iam bowled over by your
capacity for cruelty and my own rationalizations.

How could a librarian act like that?